Opinion
Can You Get Angry?
Mei Sofia
By Mei Sofia (Activist Rifka Annisa)
There is a child who is never angry with their parents, and their mother and father are always patient. The child grows up in a family that should be very comfortable and able to nurture the child’s character well. But there was a problem when they first entered college; there was the ritual of orientation of study and campus introduction (ospek / orientation) where everything that had never existed in their life happened. Words of verbal abuse in harsh voices and commands in harsh voices.
After this incident the child went on college strike, and spent most of their time sitting on the porch while daydreaming. Their mother said, her daughter had disturbed mental health since the ospek (orientation). That child often looks alone when sitting down. The mother analyzed that her child was shocked to undergo a campus orientation period that was really, really unexpected.
Unfortunately, the mother never dug deeper into how the feelings and thoughts of the child were. Sadly, it turns out that this girl died at a relatively young age (45 years) in a psychological condition that is still the same. The author bears witness to how the child daydreamed every day, but the writer does not understand what really happened because she was only (7) years old.
There are several things that need to be considered by parents in caring for children as follows; First, sometimes parenting in the family is not in harmony with the cruel and unrelenting world outside, so we must prepare our children to face it. Give complete knowledge about how it is out there; our children must be strong because being a sweet child is not enough.
Second, introduce to children various emotions, one of which is the angry expressions of their parents. Introduce what is angry, disappointed, sad, even what is pretending, because the world is not as innocent as the minds of children. The goal is that children are accustomed to seeing and dealing with various types of emotions without them having to feel shocked (depressed), with a variety of different parenting treatments already received.
Third, make it a habit to help children express emotions well and discuss children’s feelings when hurt, disappointed, or sad so that what is felt is not buried and making distractions in their mind.
Fourth, according to the writer, being a parent who is never angry (as in this case) has homework on how to introduce the outside world, while parents who are often angry just waiting for when their child’s results will be more fierce than their parents (author’s experience) .
According to the opinion of the writer, parents need to change the pattern of child care by aligning with the outside world, helping children to express their emotions. Introducing children with various emotional expressions, one of which is angry. When angry, parents should say they are angry without saying harsh words, without slamming something and so forth.
If a problem occurs between parents and children, it should be ended by apologizing and continuing to discuss it. We never know the reason parents / children get angry if we don’t understand the situation. For this reason, the discussion must be held so that problems do not occur in the future.
